Have you ever been in a relationship where the sexuality of the relationship was confusing or even hurtful to you?
Maybe your partner has criticized your sexual style or pressured you into expressing yourself in a way that isn’t comfortable for you.
Sometimes we can also feel like our partners are stuck or sexually boring. Even that can be confusing, especially when you don’t understand the mechanics of sexuality.
Sexual energy and attraction is actually a pretty mechanical thing. In fact, I can almost predict by looking at two charts, what kind of sexual energy a relationship will have. Our sexuality and how we like to express it is hard-wired and we are all uniquely designed.
I’m often saddened by how many people really think they are sexually dysfunctional or broken when the only thing wrong with them is that they don’t understand who they are and how they are hard-wired.
Everyone IS designed to have joyful sex. But how we create that is unique to every one of us.
Understanding your sexual hard-wiring and the hard-wiring of your partner(s) can help you heal, deepen your relationship and accept yourself for who you are.
Sexual Awareness – It’s Not Personal…..(even if it feels like it!)
I’ll share with you a very personal example. I was once in a relationship that utterly devastated my self-esteem. The man I dated had been married four times and asked me to be his fifth wife…on our third date.
I am a sixth-line profile, which means that I long for a soulmate relationship. At the time when he asked me to marry him, I felt so deeply that we were “meant to be” that I didn’t question his commitment at all.
I literally moved my children and my whole life across the country to be with my “fiance”. It was a nightmare. As soon as we moved in, my “fiance” began to have lots of doubts. He wanted to try having an open relationship, wanted out of the relationship, wanted back in the relationship, wanted to experiment with things I was very uncomfortable with and was completely unclear about just about everything between us.
I have the Gate 29, Commitment in my Conscious Sun. I wanted a commitment and this man couldn’t even commit to the status of our relationship for an evening, much less a lifetime. I eventually broke up with him and moved out.
The nature of the relationship left me really questioning myself, my value, my lovability and my beauty. I couldn’t understand why I wasn’t “enough” for this guy and I gave up having any kind of serious relationship for years afterwards. (Which was actually a healthy and good thing…)
Of course, that was my own garbage. The issues between me and this man weren’t personal. When I looked at his Human Design I realized that he wasn’t designed for monogamy, much less marriage. He was designed to be impulsive in his relationships and had a tendency to fall in love at first sight. And then fall out of love just as quickly. He was seductive and experimental by nature. And struggled with direction in life in several ways in his chart.
He didn’t purposely treat me badly or try to hurt me. But he was pretty unaware of who he was and how he operated in the context of relationships, leaving a string of hurt women behind him as he flitted from attraction to attraction.
Again, it wasn’t personal. And, other than not being self-aware, he wasn’t doing anything wrong. He was being who he was.
Having this level of understanding of the mechanics of our relationship gave me so much peace and healing. I wasn’t broken or unattractive. I was more than “enough”. We just weren’t a good fit. The mechanics between us weren’t working.
Are you ready to accept yourself on a deep level and use your awareness to love yourself and your partner in a more authentic, vulnerable and joyful way?
If you’ve got questions about your sexuality, what makes you tick, what turns you on or off, your relationships style, your bonding strategy, what attracts you, what makes you stay in a relationship and what makes you stray, how to love your partner better and more, you might like this..
Transform Your Relationships by Design
This is one of the courses in Quantum Human Design – find out more here
Here’s what you’ll learn:
- Understand your own energy and how it impacts your relationships
- Identify and communicate your needs in a way that fosters deeper connections and mutual respect
- Create more harmony and balance in your relationships
- Navigate conflicts and challenges with grace and understanding
- Develop more authentic and fulfilling relationships with others
- Resolve conflict with compassionate communication
This is a powerful program for you whether you’re single, married or any other combination.
In my years as a Human Design teacher, this information is the most fun, enlightening and important information you can learn about yourself and your partner.
If you’ve ever wondered what’s “wrong” with you…, I’m going to show you what’s RIGHT about you!
To learn how to be in a better relationship with the Generators in your life, enroll in our Transform Your Relationships by Design program. Learn More HERE.
Check out our School and Courses HERE.
If you want to learn about other types, why not download your FREE E-Book here